Optional discussion worksheet
Talking with children
Prepare honest, age-appropriate words, practical routines and support for children and teenagers when an adult has cancer.
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1. Agree the facts before you talk
You do not need perfect words. Start with what is known, use simple language and make space for more conversations. Avoid names or identifying details that you do not need to record.
Age or developmental needs / language or communication needs
What the child already knows or may have overheard
Facts the adults have checked with the treating team; what is not yet known
Who will lead the conversation; a trusted adult available afterwards
A simple explanation of cancer, treatment and what may change at home
2. Words, questions and daily routines
Reassure the child that cancer is not their fault and is not caught through ordinary contact. Do not promise a recovery or a date that nobody can know.
Words we will use; honest answers to “Will you get better?” or “Are you going to die?”
Questions the child asked / answers we gave / what we will find out
School, meals, transport, bedtime and activities: main adult and backup
With appropriate permission, what school or another trusted adult needs to know
How the child can stay connected without feeling responsible for medical care
3. Keep checking in
Children may return to play, ask the same question again or want privacy. Seek professional help if distress is persistent, worsening or affecting daily life. Urgent safety concerns need prompt help.
Changes in sleep, school, mood or behaviour to discuss with a professional
Trusted support: family, school, counsellor or treating-team contact
Plan for hospital changes, a parent being less well or an unexpected absence
Next gentle check-in: when, with whom and what we will ask
Support the adults need so that they can support the child
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These are discussion prompts, not prescriptions, emergency instructions or formal medical or legal documents. Use the current verified plan from your care team.
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Sources and further reading
These prompts accompany the source-checked guides linked above. Their Sources and further reading sections contain the original references.